I never was good in math. Which, I like to say, is why I became a pastor. Part of my problem with arithmetic, with the “new math” as they were calling it when I went through elementary school, was that when it was time to switch subjects (from art, or music, or spelling, or language, or recess) and begin to think about things mathematical, I simply tuned out or — as often was the case — began to converse (quietly and seemingly-subtly) with my neighbor-next-desk-over. Consequently, I got low marks in math and high marks in needless chatter in the classroom.  The low point came early on it seems, when in the second grade, I was not paying attention on the day that Mrs. Kimball’s lesson plan was to explain those dull, boring and altogether-uninteresting symbols of the-then “higher math,” called the “greater than” and “less than” signs.

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“But take care and watch yourselves closely, so neither to forget the things that your eyes have seen nor to let them slip from your mind all the days of your life; make them known to your children and your children’s children.”  (Deut. 4: 9)

The events of the Churchwide Assembly of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America which began two weeks ago tomorrow in Minneapolis are just now beginning to sink in and become absorbed into the new reality which was created.  In case you’ve been on vacation or otherwise seasonally- detached from the news of late, the voting members of our denomination’s highest legislative body, the ELCA churchwide assembly, voted with an overwhelming majority to reverse the policies prohibiting lesbian and gay persons who are in publically accountable, lifelong, monogomous relationships from serving as rostered leaders in this church.

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Jesus needed an attitude adjuster. I really don’t know how else to say it. Clearly, he needed a break. He had been ministering to the masses who would not leave him alone. Everyone, it seemed, wanted a piece of him.  Including a Syrophoenician woman whose daughter’s illness led her and everyone else to believe she was demon-possessed.

St. Mark sets it up for us:  Jesus is making an attempt at getting away for a few days.  Just a little R&R over a 3-day weekend perhaps. The region was Tyre, extending just to the east of the Sea of Galilee. It was clearly Gentile territory, although there were many Jews who also lived in the area. But Jesus wasn’t going to the region of Tyre to preach to the Gentiles. Nor was he going to the region of Tyrie to preach to the Jews.  He was going to the region of Tyre to get away, to take a break.

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If you prayed this prayer before bedtime as a child, or perhaps even still do now — with your own children or maybe all alone with your own inner child, chime right in:

Now I lay me down to sleep.
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray the Lord my soul to take.

I have a feeling most of us stumbled on that phrase, “If I should die before I wake.” It was always a rather troubling and confusing thought: the notion of waking up dead. As a child, I used to wonder how that all worked. “Well, I’ll wake up, but I guess when I do I’ll be dead.” As I got a little older, the whole concept got a little scarier. “What if I don’t wake up?” “What if I really do die before waking up? … I guess I better finish the prayer!”

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This weekend in Indianapolis, a group of Lutherans capped off at 1200 met to discuss the formation of an “alternate church fellowship” or a “reconfiguration of Lutheranism in North America” for those who find unacceptable the decisions made by the Churchwide Assembly of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America in Minneapolis last month.  Those decisions, which affirmed same-gender relationships and reversed policies which previously had excluded from the ministry rosters of the church those in such relationships are the specific reason why this group, called the Lutheran CORE or Coalition for Renewal, came together in numbers rivaling the Churchwide Assembly.

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How perfect is it, that just as the nights are beginning to cool way down as befits the autumn season now upon us, just as summer’s heat is starting to back off a bit, just as September has subtly segued into October, just as we throw an extra blanket on our beds at home to keep us warm through the crisp early morning hours, we now bring out our communal blankets to be blessed and sent into the world?  The timing couldn’t be better.

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In contemporary psycho-babble, you might say James and John had major “control issues” surrounding their self-serving request of Jesus in today’s Gospel. “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.”

One can practically imagine Jesus’ eyeballs rolling as he asks them in reply, “And just what is it you want me to do for you?”

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Did the Jesus who was 100% human really believe Lazarus would walk out of his tomb alive?

For a moment, or maybe even more, I don’t think he did.

Jesus stood at his friend’s grave much like we all do at the graves of our loved ones.

Like Jesus, we stand there in our disbelief.

Like Jesus, we are greatly disturbed in spirit.

Like Jesus, we are deeply moved.

Like Jesus, we weep.

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None of us is bound to feel good about this morning’s Gospel. Not you, the church-goer. Not me, the professionally-religious. And certainly not the stewardship committee. So let me make this quick. Not only because it’s not a “feel-good” text, but also because — frankly — I still don’t feel so good!  What I’ve learned from having pneumonia is, the more I talk, the more I cough! So lucky you, it’s a super short one this morning, so listen closely!

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With the apocalyptic movie “2012″ hitting theaters this past week, once again the American public is freshly-confronted with images of a global cataclysm ushering in the end of the world, and scaring the living daylights out of those with just enough knowledge of biblical apocalyptic literature (or Mayan culture and eschatology) to make it seem like “the end” is really just around the corner two years from now. With the terror-striking three-word banner advertising the film, “We were warned,” the apocalyptic fever of the country — and possibly the world — just went up a degree or two.

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